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I like humans. They’re my favourite alien species. I’ve been watching them for the last fifty thousand or so of their years. But I was getting impatient with their slow pace of development. So I started helping them along by lighting supernovas in their galaxy to spark their curiosity.
Then my parents found out and they grounded me for 400 years. The humans must be wondering why the supernovas stopped.
Anyway, I’m back, and boy, does Betelgeuse look tempting.
